The Junk in the Trunk

“Where is this we have come to, Dim Chum?”

“I’m afraid, Oh Commander Whose Light Dims the Sun.”

“Afraid of what?”

“Afraid I have made a wrong turn, Oh Fearless One. And afraid we are in another world, actually. A most dangerous one, in which the sky is filled with smoke and strange propellers keep the planet from falling out of space.”

“Dim Chum, I confide in you. Hear me? This is what happens when one is saddled with a navigator whose sole redeeming quality is that his father redeems all qualities.”

“Oh. Oh yes sir. Oh thank you sir.”

“Dim Chum, since we have no hope, I will tell you something. What is it I will tell you? A great secret! Our mission was to put an end to this absurd investigation of Chinese interference in Canadian politics. We would have been national heroes! And now…not only have we not come to Canada, we are somewhere where we are aliens indeed.”

“Indeed, Oh Divine Culmination of Captains?”

“Indeed, You Whose Mother’s Milk Was Sour and Short-Circuited His Brain. Indeed.”

“In that case, sir, You Who … oh superlatives are failing me now and so I must rely on your irredeemable respect for my father … in that case, may I go fishing? They have mackerel here that are to die for!”

“Dim Chum, yes, please, by all means go fishing. If we are to die anyway, which seems beyond dispute, let it be for something preposterously fishy.”

“Sir, I will give you the best cut. And I’m sure my father will give you another.”

“Navigator, you are very kind. Let me ask you one last thing. Have you ever been bait before?”

31 May 2023
Texas Jim
Back Bay of Prospect, Nova Scotia
www.granitecoast.ca